Recovery from an Affair

Over the years I have helped many couples deal with the aftermath of an affair.  When a person has an emotional or physical affair, it traumatizes their partner.  This Trama strikes at the mutual trust and respect between the two partners, and ultimately their commitment.  My therapy helps people recover the trust and reestablish a relationship built on shared commitment and love.  With time, hard work and patience couples can recover from an affair.

The first step of the therapy is atonement and forgiveness.  The person who has had the affair must ask for forgiveness and show that they understand how deeply they hurt their partner.   The injured partner will then begin a process of forgiveness which takes time.  I do both individual and couple's sessions for this part of the therapy.   

The second step is rebuilding mutual trust.  The injured spouse wonders can they ever trust their partner again, while the spouse who had the affair wonders will they ever be for trusted again.  The individuals must prioritize each other.  Both people must feel safe and that the past will not dominate their relationship. Trust is rebuilt on transparency and accountability.   The process of rebuilding trust continues well past the therapy and demands patience from both individuals.

The recovery counseling is integrated with my normal approach to couple's therapy. I focus on positive connection through better communication and personal insight.  The couple should leave the therapy with a renewed sense of trust, respect, commitment and love.